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Again, I don’t think it makes you bad, but I have to look out for myself. So if you do want an exclusive relationship with me, let’s go all the way. And if you do want it, let’s clear the slate and commit to that.” Now…I’m not going to be in something where I have to worry or wonder that the person I’m exclusive with is as ‘into’ the relationship as I am. I’m really not one to spoonfeed words to anyone reading my articles. However, in this case, I feel that the conversation points I laid out above do more to instruct than even my explaining of my viewpoint would have…As such, some of the comments (which I have preserved) bring up points that I have since addressed in this revision.Right off the top, you mentioned that you and he have agreed to be exclusive.In this case, you know he goes on because you can see it.But since the beginning of time, men and women have had to learn to trust one another in their relationship.
The fact remains though that you don’t know, but hopefully having a conversation with him will bring you closer to knowing. It is true there are dishonest people in the world and it’s perfectly reasonable and healthy to be suspicious when you get the sense that you’re with someone who’s lying to you. However, there are times where we ourselves are paranoid…if that’s not what you want with me or in general, 100% in your mind, heart, body and soul… I don’t think it makes you a bad person, I wouldn’t hate you, I wouldn’t be mad at you.Life is complicated and the heart wants what the heart wants. “When I saw this, it just doesn’t line up with someone who wants to be 100% exclusive. “Life is to short to spend our time, energy and youth on something that isn’t spectacular. I’m fine with either and if you don’t want that, we can part ways as friends – sincerely, no hard feelings.I can tell you from personal experience that this was a skill I needed to learn.In my past, there have been times when even though the relationship was good, my insecurity would eat away at me.
I am asking because I don’t know if this agreement is assumed on your part or if he explicitly said, “Yes, you and I are exclusive…” or, better yet, “I want to be exclusive with you.” I’ll explain why I bring that up in a moment, but at any rate I agree with you that checking his dating profile seems out of step with having an exclusive relationship with you…